Tiger Woods once ate at an Augusta Arby's for an entire week ...
... and then went and won the Masters.
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Hey, it’s Masters week! I’ve been in Augusta since Monday, pumping out — oh, wait, hang on, let’s give this edition a fancy ol’ dateline:
AUGUSTA, Ga. — Hey, it’s Masters week! I’ve been in Augusta since Monday, pumping out text for the day job. If you’re a fan of the golf at private clubs in small East Georgia towns, here’s a bit of the work I’ve been doing:
The mystery of what happened to the yellow shirt Jack Nicklaus wore when he won the 1986 Masters
The way Augusta National seems to stay the same even as it’s always changing
How a Texas A&M college player is throttling the field … and trying to outrun his own tattoo
Here’s a little tale that didn’t make the cut this week, a story of youthful hunger and appetites …
Tiger Woods won the 1997 Masters as a 21-year-old, which is an astounding testament to his talent, drive and skill. What’s fascinating is how star athletes can look so magnificent and composed on their chosen field of play, and so absurdly goofy after it. For instance, Woods noted in a recent book that after he won that Masters, he and his buddies rolled down Magnolia Lane, the gorgeous tree-lined road that leads to the iconic Augusta National clubhouse, just blasting Quad City DJs’ “C’mon N’ Ride It.”
Imagine, if you will, the supreme dorkiness of rolling down Magnolia Lane playing this while wearing a new green jacket:
But that wasn’t the only way young Tiger showed his age. He also ate at Arby’s every single night of Masters week. Here’s a secret they don’t tell you about Augusta National: it’s located right among one of those classic American smears of franchises — Krispy Kreme, Wendy’s, McDonald’s, Chick-Fil-A … and Arby’s. It’s located directly across from the course, so close that if you’re standing underneath the famous oak at the Augusta National clubhouse, you’re literally closer to the counter at Arby’s than you are to Amen Corner. That might not be enticing for most people, but for a 21-year-old, an Arby’s is damn near hypnotic.
Back in 1997, the draw of processed roast beef was too much for wee Tiger to resist. Apparently Tiger and his boys that he was staying with ran through the drive-thru one night, and since Woods was on a heater, they just kept going back.
“You have to remember I was 21,” Woods told USA Today a few years back. “Technically, that was my junior year in college. So my friends were there in town and we were just hungry and let’s drive through Arby’s. Every night. Once you get hot, now it’s become a routine. Whether you want to or not, you have to roll with it.”
And man, was Woods hot. He hammered the entire field, finishing 12 strokes ahead of second-place Tom Kite. (Getting destroyed by a 21-year-old is, at best, the second-most-humiliating thing to ever happen to Tom Kite.) He didn’t celebrate that night at Arby’s; when you win the Masters, they set up dinner for you after the green jacket ceremony. But you know he wanted to.
A few years back, the Washington Road Arby’s established a “champion’s table” honoring Woods (above), even though he apparently only used the drive-thru. It’s part of a long tradition of Masters champions visiting local Augusta establishments, like Phil Mickelson hitting a Krispy Kreme wearing his green jacket:
Or Bubba Watson going for some late-night Waffle House after the green jacket ceremony:
Masters winners! They eat terribly just like us! There’s hope for us all!
Song of the Week: “Rebels,” Drive-By Truckers
Last week I caught the Drive-By Truckers at one of their homecoming shows at the 40 Watt in Athens, Georgia. It was hot, crowded and glorious, a marathon post-1am stomp of raucous rock n’ roll. This was one of those be-glad-you’re-alive moments, a night when you can believe in the healing power of rock n’ roll. They didn’t play this particular tune, a cover of an old Tom Petty cut, but it hits the same vibe. “One foot in the grave, one foot on the pedal” is a hell of a lyric.
“Rebels” and all our other recommended cuts are always available on the growing legend that is the Flashlight & A Biscuit Spotify playlist. Listen and enjoy:
Book of the Week: “Welcome to the Circus of Baseball,” Ryan McGee
Ryan McGee, an outstanding ESPN writer/college football host and a good friend, just published a book documenting his summer working on the lowest rung of the ladder in a low-rung Carolina baseball league. It’s hilarious and heartfelt and — wait, let’s use this testimonial some clown wrote for the book jacket:
"Ryan McGee is the kind of guy you'd be lucky to sit next to at the ballpark, telling entertaining tales from first pitch to final out. In WELCOME TO THE CIRCUS OF BASEBALL, he combines a deep well of baseball knowledge with a sharp eye for detail, a keen sense of humor, and empathy for everyone he met during a memorable year in baseball's minor leagues. This is a perfect book about baseball, and like a day at the ballpark, the game is only a small part of the story. Best enjoyed with a hot dog and a cold beer close at hand."
--Jay Busbee, Yahoo Sports senior writer
Right, what that dude said. Pick up “Welcome to the Circus of Baseball” or any of our other recommendations at the official Flashlight & A Biscuit bookstore, accept no substitutes.
That’ll do it for this week, friends. Enjoy the weekend, and we’ll see you next Saturday!
—Jay
Land Cat, Georgia
This is issue #99 of Flashlight & A Biscuit. Check out all the past issues right here. Feel free to email me with your thoughts, tips and advice. If you’re new around here, jump right to our most-read stories, or check out some of our recent hits:
The joy and terror of the Savannah St. Patrick’s Day parade
Take a wild guess which state has a gun-shaped pool
When you just gotta have a Popeye’s biscuit right now
Birmingham’s Vulcan statue: heart of steel, glutes of iron
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Staying with the cheap diner theme, give a listen to Georgia Satellites 1987 "Dunk n Dine" about an all night restaurant at the intersection of Cheshire Bridge and Lenox Road. It's about that place which no longer exists, but had a waitress named Sally, who liked her wine. Enjoy! Mike.
Would give anything to hear Tiger say “we have the meats.”